


After the Storm

by Sams_Sister (Sams7)



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Character Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Romance, Gen, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-02
Updated: 2018-07-02
Packaged: 2019-06-01 06:33:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15137213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sams7/pseuds/Sams_Sister
Summary: Sam, Jack, and Cassie try to come to terms with Janet's death.





	After the Storm

**Author's Note:**

> Episodes: Heroes 1 and 2, references to Singularity and Rite of Passage.
> 
> This story takes place after the memorial, but before the final cut of Bregman’s tape is made. Special thanks to Teryl_Brat for her research assistance and to Evangeline for her extensive beta support. Thanks also to: Jo R. for the formatting and plot advice, Weasel for his observations about tea and other “Britishisms,” and to Venom for her patience as a helpful sounding board. 
> 
> Excerpted lyrics from “Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again,” _The Phantom of the Opera_ , by Andrew Lloyd Webber and Charles Hart.
> 
> For Teryl Rothery

_Wishing you were somehow here again_  
_Wishing you were somehow near_  
_Sometimes it seemed if I just dreamed,_  
_Somehow you would be here_  
_Wishing I could hear your voice again_  
_Knowing that I never would_  
_Dreaming of you won't help me to do_  
_All that you dreamed I could…_  
_Wishing you were somehow here again_  
_Knowing we must say goodbye_  
_Try to forgive, teach me to live_  
_Give me the strength to try…_  
_Help me say goodbye._

~

Sam stopped in front of Emmett Bregman’s “studio.” It was really just an unused storage room rigged with the appropriate equipment. She knocked lightly on the open door. 

“Mr. Bregman?”

The blustery little man spun in his chair to face her. He toned down his usually buzzing attitude upon seeing her somber face. “Major Carter, it’s nice to see you. How are you doing?” He looked genuinely concerned for her.

“Um…okay, thanks.” Sam was a bit taken aback at his apparent sincerity, but wasn’t about to bare her soul to him. “I was wondering...could I take a look at Dr. Fraiser’s interview?”

“Of course, of course.” He turned to the airman who was assisting him and asked him to cue up that section. “Were you... close?”

Sam considered him for a moment. “Best friends.” She swallowed hard and looked down at the floor. 

“I’m...so very sorry. I had just started to get to know her a little when she was… called away. She seemed to be a very nice person.”

“She was great.” Sam picked her chin up and looked him in the eye. 

“That’s why you were so upset in the hall when I…” He couldn’t quite bring himself to say in words what embarrassed him so much now.

“Got in my face? Yeah, I had just found out. I’m sorry I...lost it with you.” She wasn’t exactly sorry, but realized that he was.

“No, no, not at all,” he protested. “I was out of line. I had no idea.” 

There didn’t seem to be much else to say. Bregman offered Sam a chair and they waited for the video to be cued.

They viewed the video, Sam struggling to stay composed. When it finished, she dried her tearing eyes. “Thank you. That was...just right. You did a nice job.”

“Thanks. That means a lot.” He looked around, a little unsure of himself. “Major, I understand that Dr. Fraiser has a daughter.”

“Yes. I’m her guardian now.” Sam wondered at his interest.

“Well, I’d be glad to make her a copy of the interview…if you think it would be something she’d want.” He spoke hesitantly, afraid the major might take this the wrong way.

Sam understood the gesture instantly and appreciated it. Her eyes teared up again. “I know she would. That would be great.”

Sam thanked him and slipped out, just managing not to completely lose it.

~

A hall or two later, she ran into Jack. He was still walking a little gingerly, his wound healing slowly. 

“Sir. I thought you were on leave. How are you?”

“Better each day, Carter. I’m just here to finish my reports on…the incident.” He noticed her red eyes, and asked kindly, “How are you doing?”

She nodded slightly. “Okay.” She realized he saw her emotion and hastened to explain. “I just came from watching Janet’s interview. It was...good.” Jack nodded, his mouth working a bit. “He’s making a copy for Cassie.”

“Ah, good. Not such a bad guy, I guess. How’s Cassie holding up?”

“She’s not saying much, just crying a lot...” Sam broke off, aware that her own feelings were all too plain. “I should probably take some leave. She needs me right now.”

“Sure, I’ll speak to General Hammond if you like. You must have months of leave saved up. Take all the time you need.”

“Thanks, sir.”

“No problem. You know, Carter, you don’t have to be so hard on yourself.”

Sam looked up in surprise. “Hard on myself?”

“You’re still blaming yourself...I know the signs. You and Daniel both. Neither of you could have known there would be imminent danger of attack. Besides, either the general or I could have overridden SG-13’s plans to stay.”

“But you all rely on me to assess the scientific data. I should have guessed that there would be an instant transmission. It should have been obvious.”

“If it had been, then we all would have assumed it from the start. It was a mission gone wrong, but I don’t believe it was negligence. That team wanted to stay and investigate just as we would have had it been SG-1.”

Sam was slightly comforted, but not completely convinced. Her eyes acknowledged his words.

“Carter, you’re allowed to grieve. Everyone knows you and Janet were close. You don’t have to be the perfect soldier all the time.” Jack knew she wouldn’t let herself off the hook.

“Perfect soldier? I’ve never thought of myself that way, sir.” 

“Well, _I have_. So use some leave and take some time for yourself. That’s an order.”

“Yes, sir. Thanks.” She swallowed hard and started to turn to go. Jack called her back.

“Carter, you staying at Fraiser’s?” She looked back at him, nodding slowly.

“Yeah, for now, until we get things sorted out. Cassie doesn’t need to be uprooted any more than she already has been. We’ll see what she wants to do in a few weeks.”

“Okay if I come by tonight for a bit? Sit with Cassie a while?”

“Yeah, that would be great. It would be good for her. She misses you.” Sam’s eyes and the wistful tone of her voice said more.

“Okay, then, shall I bring dinner?” His eyes pleaded for something useful to do. 

“Yeah, thanks. That would help. Maybe bring something to cook...give us something to do.”

“All right, that’s a plan. See you after six.” He started to turn back, then something occurred to him. “Carter...I was heading for lunch. When did _you_ last eat?” She looked awfully pale. 

Sam struggled to remember. She was so disoriented since Janet’s death. It had shaken her more than any other friend’s death, even Martouf’s, despite the odd but somehow very real history they had shared. 

“Sometime this morning. I don’t exactly remember,” she admitted reluctantly. She had made coffee, but could not recall eating anything.

“Right. Lunch. Off we go. Double quick.” 

She smiled a bit at his drill sergeant imitation and fell in step with him.

~

It had been raining incessantly since Sam got home. Cassie had been sitting by the window, staring miserably out into the gray, wet world. The window, streaming with raindrops, matched her cheeks, streaked with tears. She’d been like this off and on all afternoon. Daniel and Teal’c had been with her earlier and had provided some distraction. Daniel’s own grief over Janet made him particularly sensitive to Cassie’s loss, and Teal’c’s quiet strength comforted, but no one could really provide any cheer.

Sam was in the kitchen, filling a bright red teakettle with water. She always drank tea at Janet’s house. Janet may have been a serious coffee drinker at work, but when at leisure, she liked a proper cup of tea. One of her many endearing qualities. 

Sam put the kettle on the stove to boil, then turned and studied the photos on the refrigerator. Janet a few years ago with that dog she loved so much. Before Cassie came into their lives. A young Cassie and Janet. Cassie and her boyfriend before that frightening episode with Nirrti. Janet and Sam at the park…cracking up at Daniel. Daniel, looking sheepish. 

Sam could see that day clearly in her mind. _The Colonel giving Cassie that cute little dog; Cassie delightedly dashing around playing with it. Daniel chatting with Teal’c about some archaeological find; Teal’c looking past Daniel from time to time to observe the happy child, too polite to walk away. Cassie trying to train the dog to walk on a leash; the dog getting away from Cassie and darting around Daniel with her chasing it. The Colonel snapping pictures. Daniel so deep in conversation that he didn’t even notice the dog start tangling itself around his legs. Janet’s playful look as she watched what they both knew was going to happen; her shriek of laughter when Daniel inevitably stumbled and fell after the Colonel evilly called him over. Janet’s devilish look and comment, “I guess we should’ve warned him about that!”_ Sam laughed out loud at the memory. 

The piercing whistle of the kettle startled her out of her reverie. She fixed the tea, then sipped it slowly. She thought of offering some to Cassie, but knew the girl would refuse as she had this morning. Sam looked out into the main room to see Cassie still at the window. A heartfelt sigh escaped her.

Sam wandered into the living room and sat down by Cassie. The girl turned and looked at her mournfully. 

“Sam, it’s so empty without her. So…quiet. Mom was always...” She struggled to find the words.

“...bubbling.” Sam finished for her. “I know. There’s no one else like her.” She gave Cassie a squeeze. They sat together, quietly talking about Janet, hugging and crying from time to time. After a while, Cassie withdrew a little, and went back to staring out the window. Sam left her to her ponderings and drifted off into reminiscences of her own. 

Shortly before six o’clock, the doorbell rang. Cassie, who had slumped in a stupor on the couch, roused herself to greet Jack. Sam, stymied in her attempt to read an article on her laptop, welcomed the interruption. She waited there at the kitchen table for them to come in. 

“Whew! That’s one hell of a storm out there.” He plunked the bag of groceries down on the counter. “Carter.”

“Colonel.” They greeted each other in their usual formal manner. She rose and walked over to the counter. “So, what’s on the menu?” she queried.

“Tacos.” He pulled out the various fixings: tomatoes, lettuce, onions, meat, and tortillas. “Who wants to do what?” Jack glanced around at them and took in their red eyes. “Okay, I’ve got the onions.” Sam threw him an appreciative smile and took the tomatoes. Cassie grabbed the lettuce and they got to work. 

Sam smiled to herself, her back to the other two. _Leave it to the Colonel to think of something with jobs that could be delegated. And it’s one of Janet’s favorites._ She glanced over at the teakettle again and thought she could imagine what Janet would say about all this.

In due time, dinner was prepared and they all sat down to eat. Jack kept them from becoming too morose by regaling them with stories of his hockey-playing teen years, complete with gory injuries. _Who knows what made him think that telling us stories of his wild youth would help, but they seem to be just what the doctor ordered. ‘Doctor ordered’…_ Sam thought she could hear what Janet would have had to say about these escapades of his. She probably would have snorted out something along the lines of ‘Umhm. Now I see where the knee problems began.’ Sam smiled to herself. She noticed Jack’s quizzical look and just smiled mysteriously at him. 

After the meal they cleaned up and stood around the kitchen wondering what to do next. Outside the pounding rain continued. Suddenly Jack had a brainstorm.

“You up for a game of chess, Cassie?” She looked up at him with surprise. 

“I don’t know…” She started to refuse, but seeing his face, she relented. “Okay.”

Cassie went for the chessboard and Sam gave Jack a smile. “That’s just the thing to keep her from moping too much.”

“Yeah, but it leaves you out,” he said apologetically.

“No, that’s okay. I have some work I brought home. Maybe I can concentrate if she is occupied.” She doubted it, but it was possible. He nodded.

Cassie returned with the board and she and Jack proceeded to play for the next hour or so, quietly chatting about school and college plans. Sam eavesdropped contentedly from the kitchen table where she sat with her laptop. She was glad that Jack was able to draw the teenager out a bit. 

Cassie was distracted and made some bad moves. She didn’t like for anyone to let her win, so Jack took the advantage she had given him and won easily. She looked disgusted, but accepted her loss with a sigh.

Jack looked at her, trying to gauge her mood. Nodding to himself, he decided it was time to talk about real loss. “Cass, did Carter show you your mom’s interview yet?”

Cassie looked around at Sam, questioning. “No. I didn’t know you had it.”

Sam looked a little sheepish, and was more than a little annoyed at Jack. She had been hesitant to show it to Cassie just yet, since she’d been so emotional earlier.

“Well, I think we should watch it. It would be a nice way to remember her.”

Cassie was eager, so Sam went to get it. When she returned, Cassie said wistfully, “Mom and I usually made a fire in the evening. Sometimes we’d have hot chocolate.”

“Sounds good to me.” Jack got up to go start the fire as the other two went out to the kitchen to make the chocolate. Cassie picked up the teakettle and filled it. Sam saw her touch it lovingly, as if it were a very precious thing. She put it on the stove and found the cocoa mix. A little later they were together on the rug in front of the fire, sipping chocolate and watching the interview.

~

_"I think the reason why we all manage to persevere is because we feel that we're on the brink of understanding so much more, and not just about medicine, but about who we are, you know, where we came from, what the future has in store, how… how we fit into the grand scheme of things.”_

Cassie’s eyes were full as she listened to her mother’s inspirational statement and took in her bright, enthusiastic eyes. “Mom would have liked that. It turned out really good, didn’t it?” Sam nodded and thought about how stiff and nervous her own interview had been. Janet looked completely natural.

Jack noticed an old photo of Janet on the mantel. It must have been from when she first became an officer: she was in dress uniform, young and serious. He raised his mug. “Let’s toast her: To Dr. Fraiser.” 

Sam looked over to Cassie, who nodded. “To Janet.”

“To Mom.” The mugs clinked and they drank deeply. Sam looked into the fire and for a moment thought she could feel Janet’s presence. She glanced around at the other two, who were reflecting privately, and realized that Janet _was_ present. Their memories were keeping her with them. She reached around and hugged Cassie and smiled tearfully at Jack.

~

It was late and the fire was dying. Cassie had fallen asleep on the couch leaning on Jack. Sam was curled up on the small sofa across from them, wrapped in Janet’s favorite afghan and observing them drowsily. She was just starting to wonder if they should wake Cassie and go to bed. 

“Carter.” She looked up, a little startled. Jack extricated himself from Cassie, gently laying her on the couch.

He turned and stepped across the room. “Now, how about you?” 

She looked down, somewhat embarrassed. “I’ve been leaning on you a lot lately.” 

“Just how it should be.” His eyes were warm. 

Sam met his eyes and could not keep hers from tearing up. _I shouldn’t need him this much._ He must have understood for he came and sat down next to her, putting his arm around her. She laid her head on his shoulder, feeling that it belonged there.

They sat together quietly, just enjoying the comfort of closeness. 

After a while, Sam stirred reluctantly and suggested that they get some sleep. They looked at the sleeping girl on the couch, and wordlessly agreed to leave her there. _She should be comfortable enough._ Sam pulled the afghan from her shoulders and covered Cassie gently. Outside, the storm was raging worse than ever. Sam gave Jack a look, pointed him to the guest room, where she’d been staying, and decided to use Cassie’s room. Taking Janet’s bed didn’t feel right. They murmured a soft goodnight and went to bed.

~

Morning dawned bright and clear. The sun streamed through the window in the front room, bathing Cassie in its light. She rose and looked out, sitting pensively for a while. There was still moisture on the glass, but she could see well enough to spy an early crocus pushing up through the soil in the bed outside. _I’m glad Mom and I planted those._ She smiled to herself and felt a little better.

A short time later, Sam was awakened by Cassie’s voice as she wandered around. She quickly slid out of bed and opened the door. 

“I’m here, Cassie. I didn’t want to disturb you...you’d finally conked out.” Cassie nodded and encircled Sam in a hug. 

They held each other for a long while, each lost in her own thoughts. Their reverie was broken when a groggy voice mumbled from the guest room, “Hey, anyone for breakfast?”

“Jack! You’re still here!” Cassie perked up a bit and poked her head into the guest room.

“Yeah, it was really late and it was storming pretty hard, so…”

“I’m glad you stayed.” She gave him a hug and slipped back out to take Sam by the hand. “Let’s make Jack breakfast.”

“Okay.” Sam was agreeable. As long as there was a meal to cook and someone to eat it, they’d survive. Janet, as pragmatic as Sam ever was, would have appreciated that. Sam lifted the familiar weight of the red teakettle once again, glancing towards Cassie who stood smiling at her. She handed the kettle to the girl, watching as she filled it with water. And as Sam gazed lovingly at her she felt a warm glow, as if Janet was looking down on them approvingly. 

“You okay, Sam?” Cassie asked curiously.

“Yeah…I think I am. You?” 

At the slight hesitation, Sam looked more closely at Cassie. There was something peaceful in her features that had been absent yesterday and she thought she saw her own quiet acceptance echoed on the teenager’s face. Cassie nodded slowly.

“I didn’t think I would ever feel okay again, but…somehow, I feel like she’s here with us. Watching over us.” She looked at Sam almost shyly. “Know what I mean?”

Sam reached over and smoothed Cassie’s hair. “Yeah,” she whispered softly. “I definitely know what you mean.”

~

_fin_


End file.
